Quit Your Wine-ing

Slate.com is a great place to read about things. Is it journalism? Is it OP-ED? Or is it a bunch of hippies ranting and raving about what they got to do because of some press credentials? Regardless I always find something great to read on that site.

Today Slate featured an article about tasting the greatest wine in the world. Apparently the world can agree on the fact that a '47 Cheval is the finest wine known to humanity.



I (PeanutButter), am a wine enthusiast. I have a contest with my father, or more of a quest if you will, to find the greatest bottle of wine under $20 in the world. I am convinced that these crazy wines are a rich mans snub at the casual drinker. If I tasted them would I agree? What if it's port like similarities make me hate it as much as I dislike actual port? Without an extra $12,000 this month I am afraid I will be back at Trader Joe's tonight to pick up a bottle of 3 buck chuck, (2 bucks in California). I guess the '47 Cheval will have to stay in my dreams.

I was once told by my bed and breakfast host in Sonoma county CA, to purchase wine based on taste. The same thing is true with burgers. I can go to an In-and-Out Burger and get the best goddamn burger in the world for a pittance. In NYC I pay a small percentage of my wages on a burger that satisfies me just as much. It is not about the quality but the taste. The same is true to exploring your taste with wine.

Price:

Price of wine is determined by a few things. First and most important is the year. Each year (vintage) is different. If a summer is hot and dry, the grapes enjoy a longer growing season and sway the sugar content a little higher. Colder Temps tend to being the sweetness levels down. Most say that somewhere in between is best, but then again it is all up to the consumer.

The second is the location. Even a growing patch one hillside over can produce drastically different wines then it's neighboring vineyards. Little things like an extra half hour of fog on the grapes give them something only found on a plot of land the size of your parents back yard. If these areas are discovered, word gets out and up goes the price of your favorite wine.

Finally you have to account for size of the production. Smaller wineries that have a good piece of land and a good reputation will price higher because they only produce a limited quantity. The truth is you can probably get a strikingly similar wine from a larger winery across the street. Then again maybe that little guy has some strange technique that makes his better.

Back to my quest. Wine can be a real bitch. I was at a nice corporate dinner with my father years ago. We were kind of just tagging along with some rich insurance man who wanted attention. The first thing the insurance dude does is order the most expensive red on the menu, $175 bottle of Napa Zinfandel. What the hell? I thought. 1 bottle for 8 people. I looked at my father with frustration. He knew what I was thinking right away. Before I knew what was happening my father had the waiter by his side as he browsed the wines. The choice was a $37 bottle of Sonoma Cabrenet. As the waiter started to walk away he paused and turned back to look at me. I knew something was up. "Your father made a much wiser decision you know", he said to me. And BAM! the quest was born. Since then I have had this idea of not giving in to the false glamor the wine industry has created. Also we did not share with the insurance man.

So I suppose I am responding to Slate with this piece. I appreciate the bragging, but c'mon guys. Don't tease us with things like '47 Cheval tastings. Let's hear about the people throwing down in 2008. Even if it was a mistake which created a '47 Cheval, that alone may have played into the romance of the whole idea.

The problem with this post is that I have no answers for you. I don't want to tell you how to find wines or brief you on which wines I like best. My only advice is to listen you the guy behind the counter. He has tasted everything he sells and he will not tell lies. He knows that some $13 bottles are much better than some $75 bottles. I just want you to be true to yourself and form your own opinions. Also never use Zagat to pick a restaurant.